Handbook

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chicnarol Leaders, please edit and add to this handbook. All previous versions are saved, so you don't have to worry about making mistakes. See Help:Formatting for formatting directions.

This handbook is intended as a guide to help new and existing chapter leaders get help on running their chapters. By collaboratively creating and editing this guide, the current leaders can share their experiences and tips with other No Kidding! Leaders.

Please add to the empty sections below, and feel free to add a new section if you think it will be helpful.

Contents 1 Starting a Chapter 2 Planning Events 2.1 Volunteers 3 Getting the Word Out 3.1 Community Events listings 3.2 Staying in Touch 3.3 Internet tools 3.4 Building your web presence 4 Running a Chapter 4.1 Strategy Sessions 5 Recruiting Members 5.1 Media Appearances 6 The Rules 6.1 Chapters may not discriminate on the basis of age, sex, race, or marital status. 6.2 Leaders May Remove Members 6.3 Leaders May Charge Dues 6.4 You May Not Use the Name "No Kidding!" if you are not an official chapter 7 Common problems 7.1 Disruptive Members 7.2 No-Shows 7.3 Couples vs. singles

Starting a Chapter[edit]

Initially, it's best to start with the assistance of at least one or two other like-minded individuals in your local community instead of trying to do everything alone. You'll also need some time to plan ahead before your first event and to get the word out.

If any of your initial members have participated in No Kidding! events in other chapters or other cities, even once or twice, that's a plus.

No Kidding! Chapter One provides an information packet to new chapters, at a cost of $50; the package includes a list of addresses to contact the people who'd enquired from your city before anyone had taken the initiative to form a chapter.

This, however, is just a starting point. Most of the members of your new group will find you through advertisements which you place to announce your first local event. If you want many people at your first event, announce it well in advance and announce it everywhere.

A timeline of about one month from initial efforts to start a chapter to first gathering as a new group is not atypical.

For Ottawa, this would have been:

• Sep 9, 2001 - Ottawa - Initial verification that we have more than one person interested in attending if a local chapter were to exist; alas, with NK! Montréal inactive since mid-2000, the closest existing chapter is Toronto, rather distant for most Ottawans.
• Sep 10, 2001 - Toronto - Initial enquiry to Chapter One Vancouver's Jerry Steinberg, who indicated at least one other person had recently enquired about Ottawa.
• Sep 19, 2001 - Ottawa - Initial website for the local chapter goes live on national capital freenet. Our tiny consensus selects a restaurant in Centretown for a first gathering and an October launch date. We start trying to contact the people who'd enquired at Chapter One's site.
• Sep 19, 2001 - Ottawa - First attempts to publicise an event for October in various forums, including online venues such as news:ott.events
• Oct 12, 2001 - Ottawa - Free "local events" listing requests received by daily papers, including Ottawa Citizen, listing the Internet address and RSVP.
• Oct 21, 2001 - Ottawa - About a dozen people attend the first gathering, including the initial organisers. Most found us through the newspapers. At least one found us through alt.support.childfree, maybe some through the website or elsewhere online.

Planning Events[edit]

See our wiki page of Event Ideas!

Volunteers[edit]

Many leaders have been frustrated by a lack of volunteers to plan events. Planning every single event yourself is an easy way to burn out, so do your best to recruit! It may help to explain how easy it is to run an event – many members have the impression that it is a lot of work. Emphasize that all it really takes is a few e-mails and a phone call to make a reservation (if that).

Many leaders know by now that the best response to a request for a specific event is to ask the person to plan it themselves. However, it may be necessary to be even pushier than that. A response such as “Great idea! Pick a place and time and send out an e-mail about it.” might be more likely to work.

If you have a website have a page dedicated to event planning. If no website, then a premade document that can be easily e-mailed or distirubted to members as needed or on a monthly basis to keep it fresh in their minds. Some good information to include might be checking out the venue before planning an event; calling to reserve and follow up a few days before; bringing a camera; use name tags or a sign; provide contact information to those who RSVPed to help facilitate commuinication about directions, late arrivals or cancelations.

Getting the Word Out[edit]

Chapters have had varying success with different methods of planning an event. Many chapters use e-vite, an online service in which you enter the information and e-mail addresses and members RSVP directly on the site. The e-vites allow you to add other functions, such as polls, requests to bring things, and maps to the locations.

Others use e-mail to promote an event. Using a group of e-mail addresses may make this cumbersome, but if you’re already using a mailing list it is less so. An e-mail is sent out to the group, and members RSVP either directly to the volunteer or to the group itself. The former might be a better option, since it cuts down on traffic, which many members dislike.

The volunteer can then post the list of people who RSVP’d on the list a few days before the event. This helps to 1)remind people who said they would attend 2)let the planner know if they missed anyone 3) give members one last chance to RSVP and 4) to help make members feel accountable. It also gives individual members of the group a rough idea of how many will be attending. Some chapters have found that the personal e-mail and RSVP list method cuts down on no-shows.

Lastly, you can promote individual events through such things as Meetup and Craig's List. Meetup.com is a website that has hundreds of local meetings based on dozens of topics; they do have a childfree meetup. It costs a meetup leader $9/month (soon to be $19/month) to belong, although if a local childfree meetup already exists you could coordinate with its leader to run joint events. Several chapters have complained of no-show problems cross-posting events. Meetup events have online RSVPs and tend to be very casual; people joining through it may assume that an agreement to attend an event is not a firm commitment.

Community Events listings[edit]

In many communities, media provide some form of announcement for upcoming local events. These are often free.

Some possibilities include:

• Weekly (free) newspapers usually have some small section for community groups or upcoming events
• Big daily newspapers usually will run the upcoming week's events somewhere in the Saturday editions; this may be a section named "Events" or "Going Out". These often can be submitted by fax or e-mail (contact info will be in the paper) but need to arrive typically a week or more before the date of publication.
• Newspaper-oriented websites (such as canada.com) often maintain their own online events listings, seperately from those in the printed version.
• Internet. Many cities have newsgroups online announcing local events, for instance news:ott.events is local to Ottawa.
• Cable TV often devotes a small amount of space for local community programming; these include at least one channel of text (time, local weather, announcements) on most systems. Some (such as rogerstelevision.com) accept submissions online but do advise to submit a week or two in advance.

Staying in Touch[edit]

An automated mailing list is a good bet for chapters. They allows new members to join without being manually added, and allows people to change their e-mail address or leave the list themselves.

Many Chapters use Yahoo! Groups to stay in touch with their members. It can function as a mailing list, and allows leaders to control the traffic on the list by requiring approval for new messages, or limiting posting access to a few people. By setting the default to ‘approve messages’, a leader can eliminate any possible spam that might be sent on. As each members becomes part of the group, the leader can manually change that setting so that their posts go straight to the group. New owners and moderators can be added, so a few trusted friends can lighten the workload of monitoring your group.

Yahoo! Groups also has additional functions, such as a calendar for posting events, a links list and file area, and polls, as do similar providers such as Google Groups.

If you have suitable Internet server space, there are various programs (Listserv, Mailman, Majordomo) which let you operate and maintain your own mailing lists. All support automatic handling of subscribe/unsubscribe requests, verify that a user is actually subscribed to the list before forwarding their mail onward and provide some sort of archive of messages sent to the group. These are intended for mail-only, so should be used as a complement and not a substitute for a local chapter website.

In most cases, web and e-mail are the most inexpensive ways to notify members of upcoming events. You should have some alternate means (such as telephone) to keep in touch with the small minority of members that aren't on the Internet.

Internet tools [edit]

You'll need to find a webserver to host your site and choose your chapter's new Internet address.

Most likely, your existing Internet provider already provides you some small amount of webspace; another option is to obtain space through a webhosting company or share space on an existing server. There are also many providers that claim to provide you space for a free website, often this is a last resort as it comes at the expense of filling your pages with distracting advertisements.

You'll most likely also want (or need) to choose a simple, easily-remembered web address. A name like http://ottawa.nokidding.ca or http://vancouver.nokidding.net is less likely to fall victim to a typographical error in local newspaper listings than something like http://www.ncf.ca/~dl776/nokidding and makes it easy for people to find your chapter online.

There are various ways to get an easy-to-remember web address:

• A (yourcity).nokidding.net address is available through Chapter One; it just acts as a redirect to an existing site elsewhere.
• Free (yourcity).nokidding.ca names and server space are available through Ottawa's local chapter, (yourcity).nokidding.info is similar.
• You can also register your own domain name; the cost of the name itself (not including server space) starts around $10/yr and one name can support an unlimited number of subdomains. These addresses can be redirected using services like sitelutions.com or zoneedit.com if needed; your domain name registrar may also market this as an "add-on" service.

You will want to be able to update your site often in order to announce upcoming events to local members.

Fortunately, there are plenty of webpage creation/editing tools from which to choose:

• Most word processing programs can turn an ordinary document into a simple webpage just by using "File->Save as HTML". Nothing elaborate.
• Some web browsers (such as Netscape Communicator or Mozilla Seamonkey) include a built-in webpage editor. Free download and relatively easy-to-use.
• A wide range of software exists just to make webpages; these range from free downloads to expensive commercial software. Commercial packages include Microsoft's FrontPage and FrontPad as well as more high-end software like Dreamweaver.

If your site is built around a blog, wiki or content management system, the built-in tools to edit the page content will already exist as an integral part of your site; use those and save the standard tools simply for editing static webpages.

Once you have the basic web tools, the next step is to write the text which will appear on your chapter's website.

Building your web presence [edit]

The content of the site itself can vary from very basic to quite elaborate, depending on the needs of your local chapter. Typically, as a bare-bones minimum a local site should include:

• A brief explanation of what No Kidding! is about. Yup, we're a social group for grownups who've never had kids.
• A list of upcoming events and local announcements. A chapter site might include past events, suggestions or event ideas.
• Links to other childfree sites of interest. At a minimum, you'll need a link back to Chapter One's site. "Ours is one chapter among many. If you would like more information about NO KIDDING! and/or would like to locate or start a chapter in your city, please visit Chapter One at www.nokidding.net"
• Information on how to contact you, obtain more information and/or join the local group. Vital.

Some places to list your website:

• Individual search engines typically will provide somewhere to "submit a URL" requesting inclusion of your site.
• Do consider asking other existing chapters in your region, if nearby, to add a link to you from their local websites.
• Many cities have at least a few websites which each purport to being "the guide" to the town or "the list of things to do" in your community; most of these are eager to link to whatever local online content can be found for your community.
• There is at least one webring listing various childfree-related sites (see childfree resource list)
• Chapter One maintains an official list of individual chapter sites on http://nokidding.net
• You will want to include a link to your webpage in any ads, such as local event listings on sites like craigslist.org
• There's a category in the Open Directory Project http://dmoz.org/Society/Lifestyle_Choices/Childfree/Organizations/No_Kidding/ specifically for local NK! chapter sites. This list tends to be slow to be updated, but the Open Directory information is widely redistributed. The more sites link to you, the better the chances of others being able to find your local chapter through any of the major search engines.

Running a Chapter[edit]

Strategy Sessions[edit]

When things flagged a little bit, the NYC Chapter would have "Strategy Sessions" at a central location (Amanda's Manhattan apartment) with good food. We invited any and all to come, and it helped get more people involved who has previously just attended event. We would brainstorm ideas for events, club promotion, the website, and anything else people could think of. We went through the upcoming months and were able to look a member in the eye and say "can you plan an event in February?"

It made people feel like part of the 'inner circle', gave the chapter some energy when it had been coasting, and helped us think of new ideas that hadn't occurred to us. It also helped uncover new talents among our members - such as web design!

Recruiting Members[edit]

Many chapters use Craig’s List, a popular website that allows postings of everything from social groups to used furniture. The popularity of the site means that more people will potentially see your post and join up; best of all the service is free. Your city or town may have similar services, it is worth poking around the web to find them.

If there are local gathering places, such as coffee shops, that have bulletin boards, you can post flyers on there with information about the group. It might help to list a simple, easy to remember website or e-mail address, or to have strips of paper at the bottom prospective members can take with them.

Several on-line printing companies offer a good deal on buisiness cards. Designed with the group name, contact information (generic is good: webmaster@, chaptername@, etc.) they can be left anywhere and distrubuted among new and established members to have them pass along to others and get a wide area coverge of their distribution.

Having a sign at a public events can help new members locate you as well as peak the interest of passing people traffic.

We in NYC have found it was better and easier to grow the group slowly. The initial gathering of around 12 people (all of whom found us by contacting Jerry and expressing interest) needed 3 or 4 meetings before determining how to run things. A larger group would make this even more difficult.

We debated putting an ad in NY Magazine but realized if 100 (or 1000) people showed up we'd have no place to put them. (We've so been chosen to not charge dues and to limit expenses -- to accommodate a large group we'd have to rent a space and charge $) So we've basically grown by word of mouth and people who've found us on the web.

Occasionally, once your group has been active for a while, you may get an enquiry from local media looking for childfree people to interview. As publicity, this can be more valuable than any ad you could buy, but don't be surprised if a reporter is on a tight deadline or wants to cover a story from only a specific angle (such as wanting to interview women only, or couples only).

Media Appearances[edit]

No Kidding! International is always making efforts to popularize the group, especially by appearance in media programs. Interviews on national television shows and radio stations, such as CNN and NPR, have sent people across the US to their local chapter through the main website.

However, many of our media requests are from media that prefer to speak to someone locally. These can be great recruiting opportunities! Please let the spokespeople know any time you get a direct request. Although you may be camera shy, the spokespeople can work with you to make you more comfortable, or perhaps a member of your group would be willing to appear. Since many of these requests are for last-minute programs, it might make sense to talk to your members ahead of time and get the names of those who would be willing to volunteer. And please, respond immediately to all requests!

The Rules[edit]

Here are some guidelines on what a chapter may or may not do.

Chapters may not discriminate on the basis of age, sex, race, or marital status.[edit]

This can be tricky when someone wants to plan a "singles night" or "women's group". They are free to have these as un-official No Kidding! events, or they can simply open it to anyone who wants to attend but maintain a theme or focus on singles or women.

Leaders May Remove Members[edit]

If someone is disrupting the group, making people uncomfortable, or acting inappropriately, you are within your rights as a leader to ask them not to return. Just remember that you cannot do so on the basis of a prohibited discrimination.

Leaders May Charge Dues[edit]

Charging dues has advantages and disadvantages.

While doing so does allow chapter leaders to avoid paying local No Kidding!-related expenses out of their own pockets, ultimately someone does have to make the effort both of collecting the cash and of accounting for money to the local group. If you are the leader of a small chapter, that someone will likely be you.

A minority of chapters collect dues and use the money for local expenses. No Kidding! Edmonton's expenditures, for instance, include a welcome package for all new members, birthday cards, some food and prizes at numerous events. At a St. Patty's Day supper, there could be a quiz in advance where the winner will get a free drink or, when members come dressed in green, the best dressed would win a prize.

You May Not Use the Name "No Kidding!" if you are not an official chapter[edit]

Intellectual property law provides that trademark and service mark rights can be acquired by usage. No Kidding! has obtained the exclusive rights to the name by its longstanding usage in the United States, Canada, and several other countries. Jerry has the final say over who can use the name; if you do not wish to pay the small startup and yearly fees you will have to find another name.

Common problems[edit]

Disruptive Members[edit]

Keep in mind that leaders are permitted to ask members not to return to events if they are disrupting the chapter. If their "behavior alienates others and makes them feel uneasy", a leader may unsubscribe them from the mailing list and ask them not to attend future events. It is recommended that you speak discreetly and directly to the person. Remember, if you post your events publicly, removing someone from a mailing list may not be sufficient.

Since the kind of person who is disruptive may well be the kind of person who 'makes a scene', conducting the conversation in private may help avoid making other members uncomfortable. Although modern etiquitte often dictates that difficult conversations take place in person or over the phone, e-mail may not be a bad medium, since it gives you the ability to compose your thoughts, and is less likely to put the member in question "on the spot" to respond.

There is always a risk that the personal perceptions of a leader may be wrong, and may lead to removing someone who is not really making members uncomfortable. Before taking such drastic action, ask yourself whether you have noticed that the member causes a reaction in others - such as body language or actual complaint. It is also helpful to try to articulate the problematic behavior. Disussing the issue with a trusted longtime member may seem indiscreet, but it may also be a good way to make sure you are making the right decision.

Remember that your concern is the health of your chapter - disruptive or inappropriate members may well cause people to stop attending events.

No-Shows[edit]

For most activities, you will encounter a few that indicate in advance that they plan to attend, but who then never appear. Be prepared to set a fixed time beyond which you stop waiting if you're missing someone. If meeting for dinner, don't leave the rest of your group needlessly waiting beyond 10-15 minutes for someone who may or may not show up - go ahead and order. If you have seats or tables sitting empty after the first half-hour, give them back to the restaurant so that other patrons may use them.

Some activities leave even less margin for latecomers or no-shows. A boat cruise leaves when the boat leaves; if someone is late, they will be left behind. Inevitably. A group tour (where you need a certain number of people to qualify for the group rate, and a guide is allocated to your group for a fixed timeframe) can be almost as inflexible. Organisers don't want to be left holding tickets for members that don't show up, but every minute spent waiting is one minute less available for the guided tour.

Couples vs. singles[edit]

It's rare that you will get an even distribution in numbers; in most groups, either couples will feel outnumbered by singles or vice-versa. Unfortunate, as childfree couples feel that they have far more in common with other childfree couples than with singles, but there's typically little or nothing that can usefully be done to even the balance.